Once More
by XxFireDeityxX
Summary: Lillian is let down by the two men she trusted the most. Tired of her life, she sets out to live on her own, but her past stops her from realizing her feelings towards a certain medical apprentice. - Rated T for language at some parts - crap summary
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own Harvest Moon. They belong to Natsume and/or Marvelous Entertainment.**  
**_

_**Chapter 1**_

_**Years have passed ever since you started. Despite that, I remained faithful, hopeful that you would somehow change. I obediently followed your every order; I sought to please you, but you were somehow never happy. I'd get punished for things that were wrong only in your eyes, yet I could never find a place for hatred. No thought occur to me. I was blinded from the truth; there is no shred of sympathy in you.**_

_**You never cared about me.**_

_**What a fool I was to have never realized that.**  
_

_The little girl was defenseless against the man's relentless 'attacks'. Her cowering figure was spawned on the floor, vulnerable. She had her eyes shut, her amethyst eyes concealed along with the tears. Her honey-blonde hair was in knots. Her clothes -a blue shirt with white sleeves and blue jeans - were covered in her own blood. Glass shards were etched in her skin around her legs, the warm red liquid oozing out. Her face clearly showed she was in pain, using every ounce of her willpower to hold back the tears. She prayed that the beating would soon be over._

_"You bitch!" Louis hollered, kicking Lillian's stomach. The blonde let out a yelp she curled into a defensive position. She brought her knees up to her face and wrapped her arms around her legs, to prevent her internal organs from getting injured. She was trembling. Louis grabbed her hair and jerked her upwards, Lillian resisting the urge to scream. "I told you to get money, and all you give me is thirty-dollars?!" He tightened his grip on her hair, Lillian's face scrunching at the pain. "I needed ninety, you ass! How many times have I told you to quit be lazy and make yourself useful?! GET OUT NOW!"_

_He dropped Lillian onto the hard floor, the girl on the brink of tears. Louis jerked the door open, grabbed Lillian by the cuff of her shirt, and threw her into the muddy grass. The drunken man slammed the door behind him and Lillian could hear another bottle shattering inside. She didn't have the energy left to move. Her entire body ached, her legs in particular. The glass shards were still embedded in her skin, although the bleeding had stopped. She had several scratches on her arms and a bruise on her stomach. There was a small cut across her forehead as well. Goddess, she'd commit suicide if it meant escaping this pain._

_"Lillian!" She heard someone yell, though she couldn't tell from which direction it was coming from. Her senses were dull and her body was numb, she couldn't feel anything apart from the throbbing pain. "Lillian! What happened to you?! Goddess, Phillip! Hurry, get the first aid-kit!" A red figure appeared in her line of view. She could hear her brother's rushing footsteps and her mother's frantic breathing. Relieved that help was here, she finally calmed down, though the pain did not stop. She could barely move her limbs and her vision was getting blurry. The lasting thing she saw was her mother's face against a starry night sky before darkness shrouded her vision._

_**A few hours later**  
_

_"You're actually siding with that poor excuse of a daughter?! Michelle, I have no quarrel with you, but if you're on that bitch's side-"_

_"Lillian is our daughter, Louis. OUR DAUGHTER. She's no more different than Phillip. Can't you at least acknowledge the amount of effort she exerts just to meet your 'standards'? Goddess, can't you see that Lillian still loves you despite how you treat her? I swear-"_

_"SHUT UP!"_

_Lillian woke to the sound of the bickering. Her head was still pounding and her body still ached. She was laid on her bed, noticing the bandages wrapped around her wounds. "I better thank Mom and Phillip later." Still quite shaken from the night before, Lillian struggled to get on her feet. After a few futile attempts, she finally regained her balance and was now making her way towards the door.  
_

_"I always thought you were different," She heard her Mom say just as she was about to turn the knob. "I thought I could trust you, that you wouldn't do such things, and despite the children's love, MY love, you still went and betray us like this. I'm sure Lillian and Phillip are just as fed up as I am."_

_Lillian froze. Was she indeed fed up? All she wanted was to please her father, nothing more. She didn't hate him, just scared, but she could never find a place in her heart to hate someone. But... What has he ever done to her? All he did was beat her up. It didn't matter why, he seemed to do it for the sake of doing it, even if she did got what he wanted. He never did it to Phillip, he never did it to Mom, just her. This realization caused something to snap inside Lillian, and she felt herself filling with anger. Why is it only now did she realize this? That question echoed in her mind. She was mad at herself -for not realizing this sooner, and at her father. _

_"What did you say?" She heard her father hiss. It sent chills running down her spine. She had a bad feeling about this. "You're fed up with me?!"_

_"After all these years... I should have known you'd never change."_

_Lillian felt all the blood drain from her face when she heard a bottle shattering, followed by a 'thud'. _

_"If you're sick of me, you should have just left. Bitch." A door slammed shut and silence claimed the house._

_**The next day**  
_

_Lillian couldn't believe it, she was really gone. It happened so quickly. Seeing her mother's lifeless figure within the white coffin sent tears streaming down her face. She just couldn't accept the fact she was gone. She could never see her rusty-red hair, never hear her reassuring voice, never feel her gentle touch, she could never feel her love... It was too much for Lillian. A ten-year old just lost her Mom. That was just unfair. Lillian had never hated anyone -that was before, but now, she hated almost everything; she hated herself; she hated her father; she hated the world; she hated her life._

_She looked around the room, it was empty aside from her and Phillip. Louis was busy at the casino as usual. She and Phillip couldn't believe he wouldn't at least attend the funeral of his wife. That just goes to prove how selfish that man was. Lillian would give anything -anything- to live somewhere else._

_Lillian was silent all the while, she had never heard silence so loud that it hurt._

* * *

_Lillian and Phillip had dropped out of school not long after Michelle's death. They couldn't possibly support themselves **and** pay the fees. Not to mention the 'needs' of their father. The two earned profit through busting; Lillian and Phillip were the vocalists of their school's band, their earned quite a lot. Of course, once Louis noticed this, he took every single penny they had earned, forcing the two to rely on their mother's farm for their needs; food, clothing etc. _

_A few years had passed, Lillian and Phillip now two young adolescents. Lillian wasn't as abused as she was before, but she'd get beaten occasionally when Louis was fuming at a loss or something, you know, gambling and stuff. She had got skilled in raising crops, whereas Phillip was skilled in raising livestock and poultry. They'd keep some of the money they earn for themselves, most of the cash going to their father. They were saving this up for something that may need in the future, which Lillian was determined to change; her future._

* * *

_**[Note to those who already have read this]: My friends said I should write about Lillian's past in the first few chapters. =w=They said it would look better, I hope they're right. So I completely re-wrote the chapter. :P**_

_**Please review if you haven't yet. ^w^**_


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing. 'Cold as You' belongs to Taylor Swift. Harvest Moon belongs to Natsume. _

_Note: I have re-written chapter 1_

**Chapter 2**

**Once a cheater, always a cheater. They can never be trusted again.**

**Men... They're all the same. Once they have enough of your heart, they break it. **

**I will not let such insignificant feelings blind me again. There is no point falling in love if it never lasts.**

**It just makes your burden heavier than it is.**

_Lillian had to earn some money. She could have just shipped the farm's produce, but she needed it pronto. So what better way to earn much-needed money than busting? Her father threatened her if she couldn't get at least fifty dollars, she'd be losing an arm. Lillian was fine with it as they earned at least seventy dollars from a single song. The problem was she didn't know what song to sing. She could sing anything, but with the right song, she could convey emotions into the audience, thus boosting her profit._

_The gears in her head were spinning, though she somehow managed to dodge the passing people as she walked down the sidewalk. She needed a song that she could relate to, a song that would convey her feelings. Perhaps 'Mean'? She remembered how her boyfriend would always cheer like a mad man during the concerts. Lillian could never forget those smiles he made and the jokes he cracked. Phillip wasn't too happy about he and her going out though. He always said that the guy was 'doing things half-heartedly'. She owed him a visit, she hadn't seen him for a few months now. Poor guy._

_Lillian suddenly stopped at a particular bar. It was the bar she and her friends used to hang out at, though she refused to drink anything, she thought alcohol tasted like... Vomit or something. Its brick walls had graffiti all over them, most were doodles of 'Angry Birds'. Lillian couldn't help but chuckle. The window was cracked and was dusty, and the garbage cans were filled to the brim. The place obviously needed some work._

_Feeling nostalgic, the brunette walked into the building, mentally cursing herself for giving in her emotions easily. _

_The bar was a mess! A few wooden tables were toppled over, shattered bottles and whiskey puddles were on the floor, as well as garbage. There weren't any people inside, which gave Lillian the chills. She'd better leave before something happens..._

_She was about to exit the building when something caught her attention._

_"Are you sure about this, Gab? You already have a girlfriend," She heard a feminine voice say from across the counter where a door that lead to god knows where. It was open. "What will that Lilly-girl say is she found ou-"_

_Lillian froze. "She won't find out." _

_She knew that voice._

_She tip-toed towards the door, her legs feeling like jelly. Her amethyst orbs were wide, revealing the whites. Sweat trickled down her forehead. "No, Gabriel is not that kind of guy. He would never betray me," She reassured herself, only causing her to grow more anxious. Slowly, she poked her head._

_Lillian's heart nearly stopped._

_The two had their backs against her, but she could recognize the man was Gabriel; Black, messy hair, white skin, dragon tattoo. His figure blocked her view of the girl, but the moans that erupted from them clearly showed that they were enjoying this._

_She felt her chest throb, a sob coming up her throat. Countless questions raced through her mind._

_"Who is this girl? Why did he do this? Does he still remember me? Does he still love me?"_

_She clenched her fists, a tear escaping her eye. How could he?_

_"You idiot!" She blurted out venomously, her eyes glaring daggers. Anger quickly replaced her sorrow._

_The two jumped in surprise and glared back at the brunette. Lillian could now see the girl and nearly puked. She was slim, and wore nothing but a sports bra and shorts. Her body was covered in dirt and she reeked of alcohol. She had blonde hair and blue eyes, though there was a gap between her yellow teeth, which Lillian could see through her snarl. _

_"Well, well, if it isn't Miss Lilly," The girl hissed. Lillian gritted her teeth. She ignored the girl and focused on Gabriel._

_"And would you mind telling me what *this* is? Huh, Gab?" She asked, her face clearly showing her anger. "I thought I 'was the only one for you'. What an interesting turn of events indeed."_

_Gabriel gasped, closed his eyes and clenched his hands into fists. When his raven-black eyes re-opened, they burned with rage that chipped a crack in Lillian's heart._

_"Don't blame it all on me, Lil," He snapped, adding emphasis to her name. "Who was the one who never came to see her boyfriend?"_

_Lillian wanted to whack some sense into her 'boyfriend's head, and would if he wasn't so damn tall. "You know how life is for me. I did tell you I would visit you when I can."_

_"And when was the last time, huh? Maybe... A FEW MONTHS AGO?"_

_"I said 'when I can', not 'every dang day'."_

_"Exactly; You NEVER came to visit me in the last three months!"_

_"Bu-"_

_"Don't use your dad as in excuse," He interrupted. "I don't care what the reason."_

_"It's **over**, Lil. I'm done with you. Now get your ass out of here before I-"_

_Lillian burst out the building, tears streaming down her face. The people would cast a confused glance as she raced past them. "That selfish jerk," She thought. "I should have __just listened to Phillip." But who was too stubborn to listen? She of course. She wasn't sure how she felt. Was she sad, or freaking mad? Both most likely. _

_A song suddenly popped in her mind, and although it was painful, it was the best song she could think of._

* * *

_**You have a way of coming easily to me**_

_**And when you take, you take the very best of me**  
_

_**So I start to fight 'cause I need to feel something**_

_**And you do what you want 'cause I'm not what you wanted**_

_**Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day**_

_**Just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say**_

_**And now that I'm sitting here thinking it through**_

_**I've never been anywhere cold as you**_

**_You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray_**

**_And I stood there loving you and wished them all away_**

**_And you come away with a great little story_**

**_Of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you_**

**_Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day_**

**_Just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say_**

**_And now that I'm sitting here thinking it through_**

**_I've never been anywhere cold as you_**

**_You never did give a damn thing honey, but I cried, cried for you_**

**_And I know you would have told nobody if I died, died for you_**

**_Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day_**

**_Oh, every smile you fake is so condescending, counting all the scars you made_**

**_Now that I'm sitting here thinking it trough_**

**_I've never been anywhere cold as you_**

* * *

**Evil Icing - I totally agree. I was so disappointed to see very little HiroxLillian fics. I currently have Hiro-kins at the yellow flower stage, I only got the game a month ago from eBay. PX Thanks for the review, I hope you find this story 'satisfying'. It's nothing compared to the other fics, but I'm glad you find it interesting. **

**Daisy-chan - I re-wrote the first chapter, Phillip won't appear just yet. But he will, soon. ;)**

**Ugh, I honestly think this chapter sucks. ;A; I don't really know how to write by 'showing, not telling'. I decided to re-write chapter 1 because of a guide I read. PX About how showing instead of telling was better. My friends also told me to write in such a manner. Da fuq, it's harder than I thought. I hope this chapter's fine...**

**NUUU! EXAMS! WAAAH! /shot. I have exams on the 17th-19th, just so you guys know.**

**Thanks for reading! I'd really appreciate if you could review. ^w^;**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harvest Moon or any of its characters, they belong to Natsume**

Lillian remembered her days when her mother was still alive, how life was much more normal for her—instead of doing household chores twenty-four/seven, she'd finish her homework, run outside and catch fireflies, tease Phillip, play her guitar, do the stuff she loved to do. She'd take any opportunity to leave and start anew, forget about the past, live the way she wanted, find love...

Love. Every time that word crossed her mind, all she could think of was that horrid scene. There was no point in loving again, let's face it; Who would fall in love with her? She was the daughter of a drunken man after all. She didn't stand a chance, so there's point trying, she'd end up getting hurt in the end anyway.

Lillian sighed, her hands sliding across the plate's smooth surface, the cool water kissing her skin. She finished the last of the dishes before going out onto the fields. As she opened the door, she was greeted by a soft breeze, her honey-brown hair lightly swaying. It felt refreshing.

Lillian was wearing a ragged white T-shirt, knee-shorts and her flip-slops at the moment. She wasn't really into fashion, anything was fine, as long they weren't revealing, not that she had such clothes. Although she did have a nicer set of clothing, she preferred wearing the worn-out ones. She didn't want them to get ragged too.

As she set foot into the grass, she cast a glance at the sky, colored with beautiful hues of red and orange, not a cloud in sight. To her right was their small-sized plot were a few turnips and potato plants grew, a few weeds scattered on the ground. There were several bits of trash and empty whiskey bottles, a few shattered and lying on the ground.

The barn and coop were in shambles, only a few animals lived in them; A cow named Misa, a sheep named Nala, three unnamed chickens and a white horse named Kenta. Out of all the animals, Kenta was the only one Lillian got along with. Misa wasn't comfortable around her ever since she milked her for the first time, she was so nervous that she squeezed her udders too hard. The chickens would peck her, fiercely guarding their nests with their precious eggs—She accidentally stepped on an egg or dropped one. Nala wouldn't go near her after she sheared her wool, though Lillian didn't know why. Perhaps she sheared the skin as well? It was apparent that raising live-stock wasn't her thing.

Kenta was different, he was actually _fond _of her. Phillip insisted that she raised the colt, saying she might learn a thing or two. Well, horses didn't need to be milked or sheared, nor did they lay eggs, so Lillian felt a bit more comfortable.

The sound of neighing snapped Lillian back to reality.

Her dull eyes instantly perked up at the sight of the white horse trotting towards her. Kenta's coat was spotless, though he did have black stockings. His mane was white as well.

Lillian pet his face, earning a nuzzle. "Hey, boy," She whispered and Kenta nickered.

The brunette smiled, staring into the horse's beady eyes. He and Phillip were the only family she got.

"How's your day?" She asked, still petting him. The horse just snorted and swished his tail. Horses didn't make good talking companions, but their presence really was calming.

After a few minutes of whispering and petting, Lillian decided she better prepare dinner. Phillip would be arriving soon. As for Louis, his schedule was irregular. He went to God knows where and arrive home either too late, or too early. She lead Kenta into the barn, the other animals eyeing her cautiously, following her every movement. Lillian felt awkward. _Geez, animals can be creepy. _She quickly exited the barn and made her way back to the house.

As she was cutting the vegetables, the front door slammed open with a loud 'bang', followed by whistling. "I'm hooome!"

Lillian looked behind her, and sure enough, there was Phillip the Great. He wasn't exactly great-great, but great in a way, Lillian supposed.

"Hello, Philly," Lillian greeted, now chopping the tomatoes. "How was your day?"

"Do. Not. Call. Me. Philly," Phillip muttered. "I hate that."

Phillip dumped his rucksack on the coach and plopped down himself and began counting his profit. "My day went pretty much like yesterday, nothing new."

"Mhm, and how much did you earn?"

"I'm working on it," he muttered, stacking the coins into neat piles. "How 'bout you? Your day, I mean."

Lillian sighed, she didn't need to explain herself. What else would she do besides doing chores?

"As usual, you know, chores and all that," Lillian said as she brought out a loaf of bread. "Father hasn't really said anything to me today, I can't complain though." She then poured the tomatoes, onion and cucumber into the boiling pot and finished it off with the bread, resulting in an aromatic gazpacho.

"Yeah, he's been really quiet lately, you know? He doesn't even pester me about money anymore," Phillip said, still counting the money. His sapphire orbs suddenly lit up in triumph. "Holy cow, I got at least four-hundred dollars here, Lil. Ain't that awesome or what?"

Lillian chuckled, Phillip had a unique way of speaking. "Nice, but won't Father try to _steal _it?" She asked, placing the dish on the table, then proceeding to make grilled fish. "Oh, Phillip, did you get the-"

"Yeah, it was really cheap. Let me get it for you." He dug into his rucksack until he found the Shishamo he had bought, and handed over the frozen pack to Lillian. "About him stealing it... He wouldn't steal it, more likely he'll _take _it from us."

"Yeah, probably, you know how he is."

"But then again, we _do _have at least twenty-thousand dollars, right?"

Lillian nodded. They have been saving up what they had for the past few years and ended up with a heap of cash. Louis hadn't discovered it, _yet. _They'd need it for something in the future. Heck, they could probably buy a far-

An idea started forming in Lillian's head. _Buy a farm, we could buy a FARM! OMG, we could buy a freaking farm! T-Then t-then... Why haven't I thought of this before!? Well, since we have only twenty-thousand, it wouldn't be really high-quality... But then again, WE DON'T HAVE TO LIVE WITH THIS- _

"Earth to Lillian. Come in, come in. Hellloooo! Anyone there? ANSWER GODDAMMIT!"

Lillian shrieked, covering her ear. "Goddess, Phillip, I'm not deaf!"

"Yeah, yeah, sure. You were really creepy, you know. I mean you were just staring at the wall for like two minutes, smiling like an idiot with stars in your eyes. Just what were you thinking?"

Lillian smirked and crossed her arms. Phillip began to sweat, his sister _never _smirked. Just what was going through that girl's head?

"Do I really need to tell you?"

"Heck, yes."

* * *

**Sorry for the late update. I just went through the 2nd preliminary exams. I have been really pressured by some of the parents at school, and I may have asthma. I find it hard to breathe sometimes..****.**

**Anyway, here's the end of chapter 3! I hope you like it. ^w^ Please review.**


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